The NET Life
Wouldn’t it be great if you could truly be yourself and speak your mind without worrying about upsetting others, constantly doubting yourself or questioning your self worth? What sweet relief, freedom and lightness that would bring to your life! Sounds unattainable? Trust me, it's not.
I am your empowerment guide who can gently and consistently help you do just that!
Could this be you... Do any of these sound familiar?
You have always felt different and you struggle to feel a sense of true belonging because maybe the way you look, your beliefs and traditions, your social identity is not part of the norm, of the dominant group. At one point or another, your uniqueness has led to you feeling misunderstood, dismissed or unfairly treated. And this had a domino effect on the way that you present and express yourself to the world, the way you live and how you perceive yourself.
Other people's opinion matter a lot; sometimes more than your own. You do your best to fit in, be accepted - you don't want to rock the boat as you are already know what it's like to be judged. As a result, you're holding back a part of yourself for fear of upsetting others, not being liked and feeling alone.
You are incredibly hard on yourself and have really high standards. This pesky, negative voice in your head never misses a beat - it's there reminding you of your mistakes or telling you that you are not good enough.
You often think twice before speaking up and challenging the status quo. When you muster the courage to speak up despite that pounding heart, you spend too much time analysing what you said, agonising over whether you did the right thing or should have acted differently. If you don't speak up, you feel that you have let yourself down.
You feel compelled to work really hard to prove yourself, to prove that you deserve to be here. So hard that despite all you have accomplished, you have this nagging voice that keeps telling you that you are not good enough, that you need to do more and be more; that now is not the time to rest. You might even be thinking "Accomplishments? I have not achieved that much - I have so much I have not done."
All this sometimes creates a lingering feeling of anxiety that prevents you from fully being present, from enjoying the moment and celebrating all the challenges you have overcome and your hard earned successes.
Are some of these behaviours and thoughts holding you back and preventing you from having a fulfilled life? Can you imagine how free and relieved you will feel once you start releasing these old stories and negative habits?
Imagine if you could...
Be positive and believe in yourself so much that you have this inner knowing that you will be ok, whatever happens, because you are YOU.
Have this unwavering belief/faith in yourself that allows you to be positive and gives you the strength to reach for your desires and face any challenges that comes your way
Savour the present moment and lead a fulfilling life where you are actively working towards your goals whilst also taking the time to genuinely celebrate your achievements
Confidently be yourself, share your voice, stand your ground and say no, say yes - just say whatever your heart is wanting to share and feel amazing while doing it
Release the old stories, heal the past hurt and let go of the masks - there is no need to hide anymore. Instead be that person you want to be - the confident, positive powerhouse who believes in herself and feels free.
My Uniquely You coaching sessions are for you if you are ready to work with me to:
Heal the wounds of the past and move on knowing that people's wrongdoings are not a reflection of who you are but of their own journey
Focus on yourself and stop worrying about what other people think
Build your self esteem and self worth. You are more than enough
tame your inner critic with techniques to reign it in. Feeling inadequate is a thing of the past
confidently speak your mind even when it is not what others want to hear, knowing and believing that it is the right thing to do
manage the stress and anxiety that comes with trying to be perfect or proving your worth
rewrite negative thought patterns with a focus on the positive
listen to your intuition and operate from a place of inner trust and love when being courageous. The fear of failure, of making a mistake is not hanging over your head making you feel uneasy
surrender and live in the present moment knowing that all will be well even if mistakes are made
Choose me because
I want you to know that you are not alone. So many of us face similar challenges. I did too - in both my personal and professional life.
Being of mixed ethnicity through four generations of interracial marriages, I fit in so many different groups and yet truly belong to none. I was acutely aware of my differences for various reasons including conditioning, passed down beliefs and ‘harmless’ inappropriate comments being made about parts of my heritage. These were not directed at me as people chose to ignore that I was mixed when it suited them. I had no idea how to react at the time – laugh, storm off? The right answer was to speak up. However I so wanted to be accepted that I hardly shared my voice when it came to controversial topics and on the rare times I did speak up, it was so surprising that I was misunderstood.
Working in a male dominated environment also made me very conscious of being a strong woman, sharing my opinion and standing up for myself for fear of being perceived as bitchy, emotional or PMSing. And god forbid I made a mistake, it’s something that I would not easily forget or let go. I would often go over what was said, wondering whether I could have done better or even whether I should have spoken up. Seeking validation from others has always been reassuring but upsetting when they do not agree. It also made me realise that I was diminishing my own power and dimming my light. And in hindsight, working hard and giving my all to my job was probably more about my need for perfection and proving to myself that I could do it and that I was worthy to be here; and not so much about my bosses. I was putting so much stress and pressure on myself to prove that I was as good and thinking that my work and performance somehow reflected who I was and how successful I was.
I now embrace every part of me without hiding. I want you to know that you can never control people’s perception of you. What you can control is how you live your life and how you choose to see yourself. Having overcome these limiting beliefs and insecurities, I know I can help you do the same. I am not saying that I have silenced my inner critic but I certainly know how to handle her.
If any of the above resonates with you, I would love for you to reach out and talk to me.
Start creating your dream life, you deserve nothing less... Your uniqueness is what makes you so special and beautiful.
And the great news is investing in this new life will also enable you to
Learn to love yourself and see what a glorious being you are
Live a mindful, present life that is focused on the positives
Learn from life’s challenges without dwelling on the negatives
Have better work life balance by being able to switch off at the end of the day. Your work does not define you.
Operate from a place that resonates with your values
realise that perfection is a myth
Celebrate your successes and give yourself a pat on the back for taking courageous steps whatever the outcome
Turn inwards for validation and acknowledgement
let go of the what ifs and the shoulds
maintain confidence and belief in yourself despite mistakes or failures or other people’s opinions.
Establish boundaries and say no without feeling guilty or worrying that you have upset someone
Take back control of your life
Realise that you don't need extra training, more money or things to feel worthy
All this may sound terrifying, very hard or even unachievable but trust me you can do it. I am well on my way. And so can you because you are just as special and capable. All you need is a little support and guidance.